We are gathered here today to honor and pay tribute to the life of a great pair of leather boots. Their reliability was unparalleled, their comfort never in question, their dedication above reproach. While so many just talked the talked, these boots walked the walk … traversing St Kilda’s many cobblestone alleys and backstreets, grassy parks and sandy foreshores. Ne’er pricked by a needle, nor slipped on bullsh*t.
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, when the boot is cracked and broken, to the wheelie bin it must.”